Can I feel your rage this ‘rise,
or is the beast within me still,
while I sip my morning coffee
and drown my wake-up pill?
Until the dawn is quiet,
I cannot get my fill
of my wishes and my secrets,
quickly swallowed with my swill.
Adjusting daily to this solitude,
held against my will.
I’d like to shake this routine up,
I wish it were my right.
Only darkness is my comfort,
never morning light.
Sometimes my insides echo,
screaming for a fight.
But I’ll just bite my tongue this day
and take another sip;
I’m not in the mood right now
for the lashing of your whip.
About the Creator
KJ Aartila
A writer of words in northern WI with a small family and a large menagerie.
My Substack
Reader insights
Outstanding
Excellent work. Looking forward to reading more!
Top insights
Compelling and original writing
Creative use of language & vocab
Excellent storytelling
Original narrative & well developed characters
Heartfelt and relatable
The story invoked strong personal emotions
Comments (24)
Congrats on Top Story!
I felt like this every morning before getting in my car and fighting traffic to get to work...Congratulations on your Top Story!
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Fabulous rhyming and loved it!!!💕❤️ Congratulations on Top Story!!!❤️
Congrats on top story! Loved your rhyme scheme throughout.
Great story, congratulations!
"Only darkness is my comfort, never morning light." Those lines were so relatable. Your poem was so poignant and emotional, it hit me so hard. Sending you lots of love and hugs ❤️
I could feel this in my bones through and through! Great work, and congrats on top story!
The raw, barely controlled emotions in this poem pulse through every line. Love this -- "Sometimes my insides echo, screaming for a fight."
Congratulations on top story 🎉🎉🎉
Nice beat and flow throughout Last two lines clinches it Congratulations
That last part is so heavy it feels like a huge weight on your chest so exhausting and terrifying
oof! raw and honest, yet delightfully paced and rhymed. a well-deserved and vulnerable top story. thanks so much for sharing.
Since it's You, I'm looking at this more so from a parent-child perspective than a couples' perspective, but it also reads like that of friends arguing. Plus, I'm surprised that You don't use Your whip to disarm them of theirs.
this had such a great flow...GREAT job! Congratulations!!
It's awesome
Congrats on the Top Story! The rhythm is amazing!
Just wow.
Is this the implied saturation? 💁🏻♀️
excellent.
I like it! It sounds like living for the weekend when one doesn't have to get up and go to work.
Well-wrought! Excellent rhyme and rhythm! Hope you are well!
Ooofff, this is powerfully tragic! Well written KJ!!!
This is great, especially the last 4 lines. I feel that.