When Everything happens all at Once

Has anyone ever felt overwhelmed when to many things happen all at once? Like it's so much to take in. We don't know what to say or do. Like everyone is moving quickly and we are lingering slowly. Sometimes I wish the world would slow down. For things not to happen all at once so I can catch up.

However, that's not always the case. Sometimes everything happens all at once.

As an independent author, blogger, content creator, and influencer, this is my personal brand if a critical review comes from a person. I must address the situation to be as professional as possible. With everything that happened, I have learned I will not be writing about cult practices anymore unless it's the cult leaders are dead. Because the psychological aspect fascinates me.

It's been a rough new year. The trick to leave Cleveland isn't as easy as leaving the city to embark on a new beginning. There are so much things I must do before my lease to the apartment ends, like signing a new lease in Huntington, WV. Because of family members are not as a loyal as myself, they have refused to help me or my husband. That doesn't matter though, what matters is us getting set and making sure he has a better experience compared to myself when I first arrived here after two years away.

I have been fighting for so much sense I have been in this city. I think I just get fed up with fighting so much. Mostly because I feel as though I am unworthy.

In the picture above, I feel like the girl with brown hair. I feel as though I am spreading msyelf to thin. I'm trying to keep up, however, I feel as though I'm going to crash and burn. Everything all at once is happening to much. And my mind is scattered, I feel like I'm caught up in what is excepted of me, and the other side of me just wanted to people please. My body can't keep up, and my mind is trying to catch up.

My mind feels clogged up, and it won't let me move forward. It feels like everything is just to much. This is my list and so far it's not been going very well to accomplish.

1:) Make enough money to move approxmately 2,5oo.00 USD in two months.

2:) Find an apartment before my license runs out on June 29th, 2024 in Huntington WV not far from Marshall University.

3:) Get a U-Haul to move the stuff that I had bought my previous apartment. So it's not all for nothing.

4:) Get a job to come up with the money so I can do all these things before my lease is up.

I have so many waves of anxiety constantly working against me. I can't even afford cigarettes, I feel like I'm constantly stressed out, getting laid off from two jobs, everything bad it feels like. Feeling my worthness is nothing more then the gum on someones shoes.

Can people relate to these feelings? Working so hard nothing is enough? Feeling as though you don't want to get out of bed becasue every day it seems like a battle.

Living in a tiny apartment where it feels like the walls are closing in, and I want to scream. Feeling no connection or ties in a Country I was born in? And can't go to the place I really want to go to, and had to settle for less in West Virginia because the same country I want to go back no apartment, and a pain in the ass mother in-law who is a major busy body? I feel like I have nowhere I belong.

And If I told my Mom this, she would Louise are you taking your medicine? No mother I'm just loving the gaslighting for sharing my emotions! Yes Mom I am taking my medicine but I guess I can't feel either can I? Ya that's my life pretty pathetic, and tramatic and going down.