I Should Have Asked For Better
Ask me in December, Babs' Unofficial Challenge
Here is Bab's unofficial challenge piece:
***
I kept asking for December
because it's the only time I remembered
the season matched my state of mind
and cold & bitter wasn't just one of a kind.
*
I should have asked for better.
*
The trees weren't the only thing that were bare;
I kept baring my soul with words from my diary to see if you would start to care
about the fact I kept stripping myself of my colorful leaves
and giving them to you as gifts because 'the best of me you'll receive.'
*
I should have took them back because I deserved better.
*
Snow fell as I bled myself dry, red on white was considered beautiful.
I allowed the snow to cover it up, like a blindfold made of wool
hiding the toxicity from only me because everyone else was already enlightened.
Knowing that now is why the pain of stitching and thawing was heightened.
*
But now I know to ask for better.
*
Go ahead and call me selfish when I don't offer my coat anymore.
I deserve warmth that isn't from some video of a fireplace dressed in decor.
Go ahead and call me different when I decide to hang out at home instead of with you.
I'm a social butterfly who learned to draw her boundaries in red instead of pale blue.
*
I am giving myself better.
*
So ask me in December,
while I watch the last of us reduce to lukewarm embers,
if I regret what I went through.
I don't because I stopped destroying myself for you.
*
Because loving myself is better.
***
Word Count: 260 words
About the Creator
Alexandria Stanwyck
My inner child screams joyfully as I fall back in love with writing.
I am on social media! (Discord, Facebook, Instagram, and TikTok.)
instead of therapy poetry and lyrics collection is available on Amazon.
Reader insights
Nice work
Very well written. Keep up the good work!
Top insight
Heartfelt and relatable
The story invoked strong personal emotions
Comments (14)
Beautiful work! The imagery is amazing! Truly feel like I am sitting at the fire on a snowy night while reading this. Congratulations on top story!
Congrats on Top Story!
Congratulations on TS. Great job!
Congratulations on top story! keep up the good work.
Congrats on Top Story! I enjoyed this entry, definitely top 5 of the stories I read from Babs’ challenge thus far.
Congratulations on your top story.
Congratulations 🎉🎉 for top story inspiring and Fabolous amazing story
Very nicely penned and highly inspirational. Congratulations on the Top Story!
A power punch of a poem with just the right amount of "chilling" elements to capture attention. Well done to you for being featured as a top story!
This is beautiful. Congrats on the TS.
amazing contribution to the challenge!
Incredible take on the unofficial challenge. Thoroughly enjoyed this one. Also, congratulations on Top Story!
Very empowering
Awesome!!! Loved your closing stanza and last line!!! 💕❤️❤️